A new member and submissive under consideration got the opportunity to ask Me two questions. I told them to make them count. I think they did a great job didn’t they? Quite the questions…
Now understand that the tone of this is quite subtle and very ‘big picture’. For more literal answers please see some of My other interviews. This tone was specially crafted for this sub in particular.
sub under consideration: I’d like to know how You became You. And what You aim to become in the future.
Mistress Eva: First, I will say – large questions. Artful choice.
The question of how I became me is an immense one. But I can perhaps tackle how I became ‘Me’ with a little more success. First, a childhood of great kindness but also lack, discipline and disciplinarians shaped how I function and operate in the world. This formed/forms a host of beliefs and values (that we can go into another conversation). But these beliefs and values then shape/d how I situate myself amongst others. I guess that aside from the foundational elements this progression could be said about anyone – but perhaps there’s something in the way that I communicate it that will tell you much more.
When it comes to the space in time where ‘me’ transitioned to ‘Me’… I reached a stage in a previous vocation where remuneration outweighed my values. I had achieved a perceived ‘success’ but with it came the realisation that my true drivers were being unaddressed. This had begun to strip me physically and emotionally. So I took what was then yet another pivot and based on the personal opinions of those who knew me best – stepped into another vocation under the tutelage of many a Mistress.
Since that transition it has taken many scenes, many relationships and a few cycles of self-immolation to come back to what my first self really needed and wanted. This is a combination of qualities and reciprocity that you have already touched upon – and will discover more of if time goes on between us.
What I aim to become in the future.
I am at a very lucky space in my life where I feel that I have achieved much of what I can and want. The few things that I would like to expand on, I already have – but I will welcome their growth always. This is largely quiet of mind, so that wisdom can always step in, in ever increasing ways.